Lost in the Motions Again
by Unipeg
Summary: Buffy sings about her feeling and Spike listens. Based from the Musical. This is my first Spuffy fic, so please be gentle.


**Lost in the Motions Again**  
By: Unipeg

Disclaimer: Buffy belongs to my God. Oh, yeah my God is Joss Whedon. Plus 20th century Fox, Mutant Enemy, and Co. The song belongs to Tapping the Vein. It's called "Fingertips".

Authors Note: This story is based on the musical "Once More with Feeling". A song that Buffy should have sang. But, it's after Buffy and Spike are sleeping together. It's Spuffy.

Spoilers: Possibly anything Season 6. But definitely the Musical.  
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Buffy is sitting on her bed thinking to her herself. She then get's up and grabs a stake and walks down stairs.  
"Hey, Buffy. Out to patrol, huh." Willow says cheerfully.  
"Yeah. Would you make sure Dawn does her homework?" Buffy says in a soft tone.  
"No problem. Make those demons are dust, even singing ones." Willow says and pats Buffy's shoulder.  
"Yeah, I will." Buffy says and slightly smiles then goes out the door.  
Buffy walks through the graveyard quietly looking for something to fight. She passes Spike's crypt and decides to avoid going in there this time.  
"I must not go to him." She says quietly to herself and walks off.  
A voice in her head says 'I just want to feel him'. She stops at a gravestone and sits on it twiddling her stake and music starts playing and she's looking at Spike crypt in the distance. Buffy Sings:   
*Although it's warm outside   
I feel cold inside my skin  
I really could have used fair warning  
Then maybe I'd survive this hell I'm in  
This is easy  
This is easier*  
Starts walking around again in the direction of Spike's crypt. Still singing. she stops in front of there.  
*If I could heal myself   
Where would I begin?  
I really wish I'd had a shoulder  
I'd try and climb from this hole I'm in  
This is easy  
This is easier  
Locked in all alone here   
Fate is in my fingertips  
There isn't anyone that can hold me here*  
She turns away from the crypt and looks down at the ground. She kneels down  
*Do you think this is courage?  
Does this make me brave?  
It's just a consequence of the easiest choice that I've made*  
Spike comes out hearing the singing realizing it's Buffy. He just watches and stays quiet.  
*This is easy  
This is easier for me   
Than to pretend that this will ever get easier for me*  
She gets up and walks away. Spike follows her still keeping his presence unknown.  
*Do you think this is Selfish?  
Does this make me crazed?  
It's just a consequence of the easiest choice that I've made*  
She stops and turns around seeing Spike standing there as she finishes her song.  
*This will never get easy  
I don't think so*  
She stares into his eyes and is crying. Spike walks up to her and holds her.  
"Shhh..Calm down. It's ok, I'm here." Spike says feeling her shake with sobs in his arms while he rocks her.  
"I just want to leave it all behind." Buffy says slightly braking the embrace to look up at his eyes.  
"You will make it through this. At least you told me. That's a plus to moving on and then you sang it to your friends. I think they took it alright." Spike said holding her shoulders softly.  
"Yeah, I guess your right. Thanks for making me feel better. How do you know me so well?" Buffy says looking in his eyes like he might disappear.  
"I know the one I love. Now don't say I don't. Because I do and I care too." Spike says breaking the eye contact and looks down. Buffy puts her hand on his cheek and has him look at her.  
"I know. That's why I wanted to tell you first." Buffy says smiling lightly and goes to kiss him. He returns the kiss and wraps his arms around her.  
"Let's go to your place" Buffy says breaking the kiss and starts walking.  
"Are you sure? You shouldn't keep doing this to yourself." Spike says grabbing her arm and she faces him.  
"I want to. I want to learn to love you too." Buffy says softly and looks at him with a small smile.  
"Did you say you want to learn to love me?" Spike asks not quite believing what he just heard.  
"I want to know you like you know me. And maybe while I'm doing that I can learn to love you. You might be the one that can hold me here." Buffy explains and takes his hand walking in the direction of his crypt. Spike smiles understanding her and walks along with her.

The End

Please Review!! I wanna know how I did?

Unipeg © 2003 


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